Armpit of some kind of bear...

Modern Drunkard Magazine: Richard Owen said the relationship between a Russian and bottle of vodka is almost mystical.

Gary Shteyngart: Richard Owen?

MDM: He was an English zoologist who spent some time in Russia during the mid-1870s.

GS: Zoologist? Did he think Russians were zoo primates?

MDM: Maybe.

Read on... Pretty funny, and mostly accurate...